Thursday, March 22, 2012

Practicing Awareness of Microaggressions

I experienced a microaggression just last weekend.  I was talking with a friend about redecorating my house, and trying to bring a soft touch to my husband’s den.  Knowing that I have a male family member who is gay, my friend jokingly said, “Just ask (family member’s name)”.  I laughed it off because I wasn’t sure how to respond.  This was very hurtful to me, because it made me wonder what she thought of this family member of mine that I am very close to.  This same friend and her husband also tried to introduce this family member of mine to their only gay friend.  Not because they had and similar interests or beliefs, but because they were gay.  I am now realizing that I should probably say something the next time one of these microaggressions occur.  My guess is that she is not only doing this with me.   
     

This week has really made me look deeply into discrimination, prejudices and stereotypes on people.  It’s amazing to me how often they truly occur.  What is even more surprising is that the most damaging microaggressions can occur when they are not intended.  Many biased beliefs are far below the surface, and can surface surprisingly.  “Studies show people can be consciously committed to egalitarianism, and deliberately work to behave without prejudice, yet still possess hidden negative prejudices and stereotypes” (Teaching Tolerance, n.d.).  As suggested in many of this week’s readings, the first step can often be to admit and become aware of our hidden biases.  Knowing that we have some hidden biased beliefs allow us to better control them and attempt to eliminate them.  This week has allowed me to look very deeply at myself, and has revealed some things about my actions and personal beliefs that I was unaware of.    

References

Teaching Tolerance. (n.d.). Test yourself for hidden bias. Retrieved May 25, 2011, from http://www.tolerance.org/activity/test-yourself-hidden-bias
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3 comments:

  1. Deborah JonesMarch 22, 2012 at 2:18 PM

    Kristen, Great post..It's beyond me what interior decorating has to do with ones sexual orientation, but I know this does occur. I have a friend whose son is gay..and constantly is asked to decorate. He just happens to enjoy that. But it makes me wonder was his interest pushed on him by society. Thanks for sharing

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  2. Sarah HoltzMarch 23, 2012 at 11:48 AM

    Interesting post. I also have a relative that is gay and other family members are constantly asking him about trends and cooking stuff. People have different likes and interests that have nothing to do with their sexual orientation. Good post! -Sarah Holtz

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  3. AnonymousMarch 25, 2012 at 11:28 PM

    It is amazing how others view men that are gay. I am a woman and I do not hear others saying ask Rachael about decorating because she is a woman. I know how you feel when you are faced with anothers microaggression towards another and you kind of stand there dumbfounded then feel angry later. I tend to not like conflict so instead of confronting the person right then and there. I will get angry later at the person and at myself. Thank you for your post.

    Rachael

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